


Weirdness Included At No Extra Charge

by TwoCatsTailoring



Category: Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: F/M, Iron Bull - Freeform, Leliana - Freeform, Nuggalopes, echo trevelyan - Freeform, f!trevelyan - Freeform, female trevelyan - Freeform, interrupting makeouts, krem didn't sign up for this
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-16
Updated: 2018-09-16
Packaged: 2019-07-13 07:16:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 566
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16012973
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TwoCatsTailoring/pseuds/TwoCatsTailoring
Summary: Krem is dedicated to doing his job well and right. He’s got a set chain of command that he follows, and certain habits from his days in the military will never die. One of those is always missing out on the interesting things. Also, nugs are not meant to be the size of a house.





	Weirdness Included At No Extra Charge

Having just arrived back at Skyhold with carts loaded with salvaged supplies, corpses both foul and friend, and stragglers found in the mountain passes around Haven unaware of what they were headed, all Krem wanted was a bath and bed.

What he’d settle for however was seeing the people safe, handing off the dead to Minaeve or the Chantry sisters, and dropping his reports off with The Iron Bull and Sister Nightingale before the bath and bed. Say what they pleased about the Inquisition’s spymaster, Krem found her easy to work with. Sharp, careful, and protective, she reminded him a lot of the Chief. But a lot better looking.

It so happened that Sister Nightingale was the one to get her copy first. This time around.

“I heard the bells at your arrival,” Leliana said, glancing over the report. “I thought I would save you the climb to the rookery. You must be tired.”

“We all are, but I don't want to inconvenience you.”  She might be _like_ the Chief, but she wasn't the Chief. Krem would inconvenience him whenever he got the chance.

“It’s no trouble,” she assured him with a smile, “I wanted to see the mounts the Inquisitor purchased in Val Royeaux.”

That had led to a solid ten minutes of listening to Sister Nightingale's effusive joy over the biggest nug he’d seen in his life. It was massive, docile, and determined to give his hair a thorough sniffing.  All he could think about was the fact that its hands were bigger than his.

Cremissius Aclassi did not like that one bit.

After escaping the stables and hoping there wasn't nug snot in his hair, he headed for the tavern then up the stairs, two at a time, to deliver his report to The Iron Bull.  A perfunctory knock on the attic door and Krem let himself in.

“We’re back, Chief,” he said to Bull’s back. “Not pretty, but job done. Grim got in with…”

“Krem,” the evenness of Bull’s voice was enough to give his lieutenant pause to actually take in the awkward hunch of his shoulders where he stood at the end of his bed.

And the well-shod foot at the end of the shapely leg wrapped around his waist, probably belonging to the same body as the arm snaked around his neck. And the hand with a white-knuckled grip on one of Bull’s horns.

“Riiiight.” It was hard not to snort. At least nobody was naked this time. Yves still couldn't look him in the eye and all Krem had seen of him was a bare thigh.

“Indeed,” came the slightly breathless reply of this afternoon’s distraction. A shift, and the familiar dark head of the Inquisitor herself popped up over Bull’s shoulder. “Perhaps a full report can wait?”

Krem coughed, a dry sound for what he was sure was his soul fucking right off to the Fade. “Of course, Your Worship,” he stammered, backing out the door as quickly as he’d entered, only mildly concerned that his eyes were going to fall out of his head.

Two thoughts were paramount in his mind as Krem finally found himself in a bath and recovered enough from surprise to see the humor of it all. The first was why was he even surprised at all. 

The second was why he always seemed to be away when things started to get interesting.


End file.
